this is for my dad, but you can read it if you want to...

Many years ago, I had a notebook where I wrote down little things I remember about my dad. Each item started with “I remember when…”

I intended to put them in little pieces of paper, put it in a jar and give it to him as a gift. My dad delights on little things his kids make for him. Too bad, I cannot find the notebook now so I will make an attempt to recreate what I wrote down many years ago.

I remember when…

You always drink cold water after you brush your teeth, and form an “O” with your mouth after you chug down a glass of water.

You bend your knees when you fix your hair on mommie’s “tokador” because the mirror is too low (I wonder why you didn’t just sit on a chair?).

You love playing pranks on your kids like the time you came home wearing a gorilla mask or the time you placed a poop paper mache on the bed.

Your heart broke when Digger got lost and drove around the neighborhood for more than an hour hoping to find him (I was pretty sure you were crying the whole time)

You give me a special massage every time my legs ache when it’s cold.

You rub my neck with Vicks and wrap it with bandanna when I have sore throat.

You pour your coffee on a saucer when it’s too hot to drink, then place it back in the cup when its a bit cooler.

You like eating pan de sal with butter and coco jam and would willingly make one for us when we eat breakfast together.

You let the one seated beside you in the car lead the morning prayer as you drive us to school in the morning.

You drove us around Makati during the holidays so we can see the Christmas lights and decorations of office buildings.

You tuck me and Dionne in every night and make us into little “sumans,” and pat us to sleep while singing “meme”

You and mommie speak in English everytime you talk about the little kids (and you thought we didn’t understand! Hahaha!)

You hire janitors in school so I don’t have to carry my bags when I go up the stairs.

You don't tell on me when I have stale uneaten sandwiches in my bag because you know Mommie would go ballistic.

You like recreating drawings you find in the encyclopedia (mostly skeletons) because you thought we would probably need it for some school project.

You make most of my projects for art class and always had your art work placed on the bulletin board because of high marks (as if my teachers believed I made it myself!). My favorite was the horse you made out of corkboard. That was the best!

You brought in a truckload of old newspaper (which you bought from a junk yard) so that our class would win the newspaper fund drive. We did, and got a swimming holiday for a prize.

You were a local heartthrob in my school and most of my teachers had a crush on you. They even gave you a pet name – James Bond.

You watch basketball every Tuesday, Thursday and Sunday night. And the TV was off limits to all of us. We only had one TV those days and so we all secretly wished all basketball players would perish so we can watch other shows instead.

We drive as far as Greenhills to rent movies for our betamax, and you rented Dynasty and Falcon Crest so you wouldn’t have to follow it on TV.

You make us take a tablespoon of honey before going to bed, saying that it will make us sleep well.

You use the brown bag technique everytime we get hiccups and is quite successful in “catching” our hiccups in the bag.

On New Year’s Eve, you take us to Roxas Boulevard to look for the biggest and loudest “torotot.”

You make me wear headphones on New Year’s eve so I won’t hear the firecrackers.

You give us nicknames which up to now I wonder where you get. Bandangera, Burakda, Buleleng. I was “Bandang” for many years.

You make the trip to the drug store quite exciting because of “Horlicks.”

You come home, open your attaché case and its filled with beginner bras which you bought from an officemate (imagine, instead of Mommie, you were the one who bought me my first bra!).

You make it a point to be in every school presentation and once I was disappointed when you didn’t watch my performance as Jane of Aza. Later that night, you explained that you had to go to an important meeting.

You like giving other people rides in your rickety Volkswagen beetle which has seen better days.

………………………………………..


I have daddy to thank for having the best childhood. Looking back, I see myself laughing most of the time. We thrived on Daddy’s jokes, and flourished on his words of wisdom.

There is still so much I remember and all those memories – while simple and irrelevant to most – make me realize that I have a dad:

who is funny but serious about his role,

who is handsome but knows how to make fun of himself,

who is weird but uniquely charming,

who is thoughtful and giving,

who is prayerful and humble,

who is nurturing but teaches independence;

who can win the “Best Dad on Earth” award – hands down.



Happy Father’s Day Daddy!

Making Miracles

We attended the first session of The Feast today and the topic was "How to be a Miracle Worker". It was the 4th of the 24 Building Blocks of the Champion's Life. Bo Sanchez talked about the 5 ways to create wonders in one's life.

Bo first mentioned that in Latin, the literal meaning of the word miracle is "something wonderful." These days we just associate "miracle" with "magic" or an occurence that is incredible and "out of this world." But if we revert to its original meaning, it is safe to say that we can always create miracles in our life. Having "something wonderful" happen to you can even be a daily occurence, if you will it to happen.

At one point in my life, I felt that I was neck deep in quicksand and any movement I make will make me sink even deeper and eventually take the living daylights out of me. I am talking about the time I left home and decided to be with Lyndon. I made a decision out of stubborness and pride and it severely affected my relationsip with my parents. It was a difficult time because not only were we financially unstable, we were also hurting my family really bad. I made some choices that I thought were right at that time, until the difficulties started pouring in. I was in a rut. We were deep in debt and living from paycheck to paycheck. I didn't know how to get out. There also came a point when I had to swallow my pride and move in with my sister, we just couldnt sustain living on our own anymore.

Those were dark days too because we had to abide by the rules of the household and animosity was beginning to broil. I was dying to move out again but my circumstances prevented me.

I was in a deeper rut. I never blamed the Lord for what was happening in our life because I knew perfectly well that my choices led me to where I was. However, I didn't also bother lifting a finger to ask for God's help. I told myself "I brought myself here, I'll bring myself out."

Then one day, Lyndon decided he would attend Bo's church service. We were being invited by his brother for so long but we never gave it a thought. He came back from the church service a different person. Soon after I started attending too. Little by little I came to realize that God has a better plan for my life. He doesn't want me to be in the mess that I am in. In fact, He wants me to be successful and achieve all my dreams.

Blessings then started pouring. For one, Lyndon got a permanent job. At 40, he was beginning to be desperate about the possibility of getting a full time job. I got retained amidst a major restructuring in our company with a promotion to top it off. We were able to move to a nice apartment building that fits our requirements and was within our budget. Most important of all we have been forgiven by my family and things are better between us.

My life today isn't all perfect. There are still days when I struggle. There are still moments when I blame myself for the mistakes of the past. There are still aspects of my life that need correcting. But I am better. I am healing and I'm learning to love myself more and more. I'm beginning to create miracles in my own life.

The Feast

For the past four months, Lyndon and I have been attending The Feast every Sunday. It is a weekly gathering organized by the Light of Jesus Community, a Catholic Organization founded by Bo Sanchez.

For a number of years I’ve been remiss in religious obligations; I rarely went to church and consciously avoided every opportunity to do so. For me, putting up with an hour long church service was pure torment; I had to listen to an often boring if not difficult to understand homily. I had to mouth words (supposed to be prayers) that simply did not do much to strengthen my faith. I started to attend Protestant services and discovered that I felt more fulfilled and blessed singing songs of praise and listening to God’s word. It came to a point that I thought of leaving the Catholic Church and be baptized in Christian/Protestant rites. But having been brought up and educated in the Catholic faith, this was a very difficult choice to make. Not knowing how to proceed, I simply stopped going to church, Catholic or otherwise.

Then Lyndon’s brother and his wife invited us to join them at the Feast. For many years, they have been inviting us to attend church services with them, back when they used to hold gatherings at the AFP Theater. But their congregation grew in number and so they had to move to the Arena, a new sports complex in San Juan. The place was a lot nearer Pasig so we went one Sunday in April. Lyndon went first and he came home raving about the experience. I told myself, “If he could last all three hours of the church service and still come home feeling he wanted more of it – then this is something else.” I joined him the week after.

Since then, we try not to miss a single church service. The Feast starts with a Catholic mass, then “Praise and Worship” where we sing songs and dance and have fun while glorifying, thanking and worshiping the Lord. After which, an inspirational talk by one of the Kerygma preachers.

When before, attending a Sunday mass tested my patience, now I’ve come to appreciate and understand how each ritual is a vital part of my Catholic faith. The Praise and Worship that comes after allows me to profess my faith in the Lord, ask for forgiveness for my mistakes and glorify and thank Him for keeping me under his wing.

The inspirational talk that comes in the end allows me learn from gifted preachers (Bo Sanchez, Arun Gogna, Alvin Barcelona, Obet Cabrillas, Jon Escoto and Adrian Panganiban) who have become instruments of the Lord in spreading His Word.

Attending the Feast has done so much for me that I do not know how to begin counting. Being there every Sunday allows me to thank the Lord for all the blessings he showered me during the week that passed and affirm my faith that he will continue to sustain and protect me in the coming week.

I’ve been inviting my family and friends to come to the Feast as well, because I want them to experience the same kind of high that I get every week. I haven’t been too successful in this endeavor just yet. Maybe it will take a few years (as how it happened to me) but I will continue to prod and insist because the Feast will open doors for more blessings in their life.

I know. It happened to me.

sunrise, sunset

Finished a couple of paintings in the past few weeks. Hope to do more over the weekend.


sunrise...


...sunset.

three cats and a dog

It took me two weeks to finish my second painting because I got an eye infection which caused my right eye to water incessantly. Had it checked by our company optalmologist and true enough, it was inflamed. He gave me anti-bacterial eye drops which i had to use for a week. Well, after a couple of days i stopped using it...too much fuss for me!

Now that I've finished my second painting, I'm feeling so impatient about getting my materials from the box my dad sent. I'm sure my third or fourth and onward will not be as nice as the first two, because i would be on my own by then.

Let me show you how my artwork turned out...

Sorry it's quite blurry...used my cellphone's camera for this shot

up close, now isn't that nice?

So, what should I call this painting now?

I, Horse

I’ve acquired a new hobby.

I’ve been wanting to learn how to paint and follow the footsteps of my uncle, my aunt and of course my dad. He has taken up painting as a hobby a few years back and once he sent me a few of his finished works. They were small paintings of landscapes and seascapes and from then on I told myself I would someday learn to make something like that.

Last week, I received a small package from my dad containing two sets of paint-by-number art works. A paint-by number set consists of a canvas with a featured sketch, a set of numbered acrylic paints and a brush. All you have to do is follow the number codes, blend acrylic paints according to the codes and proceed with the painting.

I immediately started on the first one and here is what I came up with:



Not bad, according to my dad, and advised me to brace myself for the real thing. He has already sent my painting materials (brushes, an easel, canvasses, acrylic paints and lots of good luck) and they should be here by end of November. I’m so excited!


By the way, what do you think should I call my untitled artwork?

"Cool" Job

October 29, Sunday was a working day for me. John (my officemate and friend) hied off to SMC’s Management Training Center in Tagaytay to conduct a 2-day Teambuilding Program for one of SMC’s packaging companies. San Miguel Yamamura Asia is a glass manufacturing company which supplies most of the glass packaging products in the market.

While waiting for our rooms at the lodging house, John and I took some pictures. It was very cold even though these pics were taken just right after lunch on Sunday.

Right outside the entertainment lounge of the MTC ldging house

How's that for a great view?

It was a rainy two-day teambuilding session (thanks to Typhoon Paeng) and due to the bad weather, we had to do our outdoor activities, indoors. We had to make do with the hallways of the training center for the activities; good thing we were able to meet our objectives.

With the participants from SMY Asia

The highlight of the teambuilding program was the inspirational talk of Fr. Armand Robleza, SMC’s resident chaplain. He talked about “The Passion and the Romance.” It has absolutely nothing to do with romance or passion in a sexual context; instead it centers on making oneself a source of inspiration through the values and principles that one lives by. Fr. Armand was his usual animated self, complete with sound effects and facial expressions; based on the evaluation results, the participants appreciated the session he conducted.

Monday after lunch, we were on our way back to Manila but had to stop by Starbucks because it was rather difficult to drive, with all the fog on the road. We took a couple of pictures for posterity:

John and I with Jonathan (standing) and Gilbert

this time with Ana, HR Manager of SMY Asia

Sipping a café latte, on a Monday afternoon, in the middle of cool Tagaytay air (while being paid) now that’s what I call, a cool job!

Why do I blog?

Is it to virtually immortalize my existence? Is it to make my humdrum life appear somewhat interesting? Is it to clamor for attention or aspire for literary acclaim?

I write in my blog because I want to be a first-row spectator to my own life. I don’t care if people do not read my blog, or care if my entries are worth commenting on.

I write in my blog because there are moments, which a few years from now will not feel as intense or as important. There are days, which I just need and want to remember.

I write in my blog because there are life lessons I thought I learned but eventually forget. I need to review these learnings, for fear of failing again.

I write in my blog because I want to dedicate some entries to people who have inspired, touched, amused, hurt, moved, taught, angered or cheered me; people who make me experience what being human is all about.

I write in my blog because after days of battling responsibilities, making decisions, making mistakes, winning arguments and everything else, I want to contemplate my own thoughts, feelings and emotions.

Yeah, that’s it. That is why.