A Night of Freeloading

In early December, my office friends and I decided to have a fancy Christmas dinner as a way to reward ourselves. By fancy, we meant splurging on buffet at a five-star hotel. The first choice if of course Manila Diamond since Mark’s dad works there and so we have a better chance of getting a discount. On December 11, we went through with the plan but sadly, Ela and Enny couldn’t make it because of previous engagements. So Pia and I braved the Ortigas-Makati-Manila traffic in order to get to Manila Diamond where Mark was already nearing unconsciousness because of hunger.

When we arrived, Mark was already having his soup and soon after his dad called, looking for him. The General (Mark’s Dad) then came to sit with us over dinner, much to Mark’s disappointment. But when his dad started ordering different dishes straight from the kitchen, we were all thankful that he was there with us.

The menu theme for Thursday night was Spanish so most of the food fare were sumptuous, spicy and flavorful. We tried sampling everything but we had to leave room for dessert. Good thing we did because the cakes and pastries were heavenly! We even tried asking the chef if they can sell us whole cakes, but sadly, they don’t do that in their hotel.

Much later, Mark’s mom came, done with her spa treatment. They stayed for a while and when they said goodbye, they left us with a special treat… dinner is free! We thought that we were just getting a good discount but Mark’s dad footed the bill.

After dinner, we did a photo op at the hotel lobby. Manila Diamond has a very interesting Christmas tree so we thought of taking our pics with it.

We capped the night with coffee at Starbucks Magallanes. We were all feeling dizzy while making our orders and we all thought that it was probably from all the food we ate earlier. It was not even 12am then but we were feeling sleepy already. Pia attributed it to age, Mark from being tired from work, and me from having late nights for more than a week. Soon after we said goodbye and took separate rides home. It was weekday after all and there’s still work the next day.

It is always great being with these two, even if i have to be the "bridge" all the time.

I'll Always be his Baby

Let me tell you about the man in my life.

A not-so-tall, dark and handsome man who has touched my life in enormous ways.

He has a great sense of humor and can carry a good conversation any time.

He is a great friend, a sensible advisor and a staunch critic - depending on what you need him to be at a particular moment.

He likes to paint, loves to cook and enjoys reading. Saying that we share the same interests would be an understatement, because we are in many ways, alike.

He has a profound understanding of life, much of which was derived from experience and then some from commom sense. Life lessons he eagerly shares to those who are willing (or needed) to listen.

He is a prayerful soul and a faithful servant of the Lord. A trait I struggle to emulate every single day of my life.

He has other women, sure. One he calls “Ne”, the other Sweetheart, and still another, his Bunso.

He would often call me Honey. But I love it most when he calls me his Baby.



Let's celebrate your next together. But for now, Happy 67th Daddy!

this is for my dad, but you can read it if you want to...

Many years ago, I had a notebook where I wrote down little things I remember about my dad. Each item started with “I remember when…”

I intended to put them in little pieces of paper, put it in a jar and give it to him as a gift. My dad delights on little things his kids make for him. Too bad, I cannot find the notebook now so I will make an attempt to recreate what I wrote down many years ago.

I remember when…

You always drink cold water after you brush your teeth, and form an “O” with your mouth after you chug down a glass of water.

You bend your knees when you fix your hair on mommie’s “tokador” because the mirror is too low (I wonder why you didn’t just sit on a chair?).

You love playing pranks on your kids like the time you came home wearing a gorilla mask or the time you placed a poop paper mache on the bed.

Your heart broke when Digger got lost and drove around the neighborhood for more than an hour hoping to find him (I was pretty sure you were crying the whole time)

You give me a special massage every time my legs ache when it’s cold.

You rub my neck with Vicks and wrap it with bandanna when I have sore throat.

You pour your coffee on a saucer when it’s too hot to drink, then place it back in the cup when its a bit cooler.

You like eating pan de sal with butter and coco jam and would willingly make one for us when we eat breakfast together.

You let the one seated beside you in the car lead the morning prayer as you drive us to school in the morning.

You drove us around Makati during the holidays so we can see the Christmas lights and decorations of office buildings.

You tuck me and Dionne in every night and make us into little “sumans,” and pat us to sleep while singing “meme”

You and mommie speak in English everytime you talk about the little kids (and you thought we didn’t understand! Hahaha!)

You hire janitors in school so I don’t have to carry my bags when I go up the stairs.

You don't tell on me when I have stale uneaten sandwiches in my bag because you know Mommie would go ballistic.

You like recreating drawings you find in the encyclopedia (mostly skeletons) because you thought we would probably need it for some school project.

You make most of my projects for art class and always had your art work placed on the bulletin board because of high marks (as if my teachers believed I made it myself!). My favorite was the horse you made out of corkboard. That was the best!

You brought in a truckload of old newspaper (which you bought from a junk yard) so that our class would win the newspaper fund drive. We did, and got a swimming holiday for a prize.

You were a local heartthrob in my school and most of my teachers had a crush on you. They even gave you a pet name – James Bond.

You watch basketball every Tuesday, Thursday and Sunday night. And the TV was off limits to all of us. We only had one TV those days and so we all secretly wished all basketball players would perish so we can watch other shows instead.

We drive as far as Greenhills to rent movies for our betamax, and you rented Dynasty and Falcon Crest so you wouldn’t have to follow it on TV.

You make us take a tablespoon of honey before going to bed, saying that it will make us sleep well.

You use the brown bag technique everytime we get hiccups and is quite successful in “catching” our hiccups in the bag.

On New Year’s Eve, you take us to Roxas Boulevard to look for the biggest and loudest “torotot.”

You make me wear headphones on New Year’s eve so I won’t hear the firecrackers.

You give us nicknames which up to now I wonder where you get. Bandangera, Burakda, Buleleng. I was “Bandang” for many years.

You make the trip to the drug store quite exciting because of “Horlicks.”

You come home, open your attaché case and its filled with beginner bras which you bought from an officemate (imagine, instead of Mommie, you were the one who bought me my first bra!).

You make it a point to be in every school presentation and once I was disappointed when you didn’t watch my performance as Jane of Aza. Later that night, you explained that you had to go to an important meeting.

You like giving other people rides in your rickety Volkswagen beetle which has seen better days.

………………………………………..


I have daddy to thank for having the best childhood. Looking back, I see myself laughing most of the time. We thrived on Daddy’s jokes, and flourished on his words of wisdom.

There is still so much I remember and all those memories – while simple and irrelevant to most – make me realize that I have a dad:

who is funny but serious about his role,

who is handsome but knows how to make fun of himself,

who is weird but uniquely charming,

who is thoughtful and giving,

who is prayerful and humble,

who is nurturing but teaches independence;

who can win the “Best Dad on Earth” award – hands down.



Happy Father’s Day Daddy!

Happy 65th Birthday Mommie!

We gave Mommie a surprise party for her 65th birthday. Together with my sisters, we went behind her back and became thieves (had to steal her old pictures from her "baul") and liars during the four weeks that we prepared for her party. Somewhere along the way we were getting nervous that she was smelling something cooking but the surprised look on her face during the party told us that we were successful.

Seeing her face light up that night when she saw all her friends and closest relatives in one room was worth all the trouble we went through. We were even able to bring in one of her brothers who had a stroke a couple of years ago. All her friends from her former work were there too. We invited a rondalla band for entertainment, played games, gave out prizes and fancy souvenirs and listened to testimonials from friends and family. There was even a video greeting from my dad, my brother and his family in Texas. One of the highlight of the evening was an AVP we prepared for her. It somehow sums up the woman that we call Mommie...

At the end of the party, our emcee (my best friend Annie) called her on stage. I never realized my mom was a good public speaker (it really is in my genes-hahaha!) until she began -- impromptu mind you -- telling the guests how thankful she is for her kids (ahem ahem!). What struck me most was when she said, "natupad ko ang mga pangarap ko dahil sa mga anak ko" (I realized all my dreams through my kids). She went on to say that she may not have realized her personal aspirations because of marriage and family, but the achievements of her children makes her feel that she actually did.

Since we were little, my siblings and I have known her to be a disciplinarian who would never allow her children to get into trouble. She is straightforward, a bit prudish and and one tough woman. She tended to all four of us while Daddy was working abroad. She brought us up emphasizing that education will be our best tool to have a better future.

I've never know my mom as an emotional woman...but that night, I saw tears of happiness in her eyes and heard her speak about her children with much pride in her voice.

I am thankful that we cooked up this party for her, because in a way, we were able to thank her for the many years that she dedicated to us.

Making Miracles

We attended the first session of The Feast today and the topic was "How to be a Miracle Worker". It was the 4th of the 24 Building Blocks of the Champion's Life. Bo Sanchez talked about the 5 ways to create wonders in one's life.

Bo first mentioned that in Latin, the literal meaning of the word miracle is "something wonderful." These days we just associate "miracle" with "magic" or an occurence that is incredible and "out of this world." But if we revert to its original meaning, it is safe to say that we can always create miracles in our life. Having "something wonderful" happen to you can even be a daily occurence, if you will it to happen.

At one point in my life, I felt that I was neck deep in quicksand and any movement I make will make me sink even deeper and eventually take the living daylights out of me. I am talking about the time I left home and decided to be with Lyndon. I made a decision out of stubborness and pride and it severely affected my relationsip with my parents. It was a difficult time because not only were we financially unstable, we were also hurting my family really bad. I made some choices that I thought were right at that time, until the difficulties started pouring in. I was in a rut. We were deep in debt and living from paycheck to paycheck. I didn't know how to get out. There also came a point when I had to swallow my pride and move in with my sister, we just couldnt sustain living on our own anymore.

Those were dark days too because we had to abide by the rules of the household and animosity was beginning to broil. I was dying to move out again but my circumstances prevented me.

I was in a deeper rut. I never blamed the Lord for what was happening in our life because I knew perfectly well that my choices led me to where I was. However, I didn't also bother lifting a finger to ask for God's help. I told myself "I brought myself here, I'll bring myself out."

Then one day, Lyndon decided he would attend Bo's church service. We were being invited by his brother for so long but we never gave it a thought. He came back from the church service a different person. Soon after I started attending too. Little by little I came to realize that God has a better plan for my life. He doesn't want me to be in the mess that I am in. In fact, He wants me to be successful and achieve all my dreams.

Blessings then started pouring. For one, Lyndon got a permanent job. At 40, he was beginning to be desperate about the possibility of getting a full time job. I got retained amidst a major restructuring in our company with a promotion to top it off. We were able to move to a nice apartment building that fits our requirements and was within our budget. Most important of all we have been forgiven by my family and things are better between us.

My life today isn't all perfect. There are still days when I struggle. There are still moments when I blame myself for the mistakes of the past. There are still aspects of my life that need correcting. But I am better. I am healing and I'm learning to love myself more and more. I'm beginning to create miracles in my own life.

The Gifts of '07

I guess I'm a couple of weeks late in writing this blog but then again i haven't found the time until now.

Last night, a tragedy happened. Lyndon left his brand new cellphone in the taxi. He called me up just before he stepped out of the cab so we knew exactly where he left it. It was barely 4 days old and friends who saw it said it was a good buy... well, now its a good bye (pun intended hahaha)! He was feeling so down that i had to tell him to just pray for the guy who got it, and hope that he be blessed by having it. I couldn't believe i told him that, PRAY i mean...but one of the greatest gifts '07 brought was the gift of prayer. I re-discovered prayer when we started attending The Feast in March'07 and since then, i started appreciating again the powers of faith and humility.

Aside from the above (and to further veer away from the sad story of the lost cellphone), let me make a list of the gifts (or blessing) i received in the past year. In no particular order, here it goes...

1. A new apartment that's big enough, nice enough and near enough (to my office and my sister's house).
2. A promotion that rewarded my hard work and added a few more cash to my pocket
3. A church service to attend that reinforces my faith and allows me to appreciate God's presence in my life (add to that, a roster of great preachers)
4. A stable job for Lyndon that improved our finances and boosted his self confidence.
5. A week-long vacation in Cebu with my mom that allowed us to rediscover each other and improved our relationship
6. A great boss (also a great friend and confidante), who allows me to soar as high as she believes I can
7. Great friends who despite my shortcomings are ready to forgive and (hopefully) forget
8. A best friend who has memorized and adapted to my quirks and remained to be one of my biggest fans.
9. My dad who roots for me in every endeavor I take and loves me beyond measure and understanding
10. My family who's always fun and funky, and all the good that comes with it.
11. Kira Isobel who at less than 2 months old is gearing up to be the next darling of the family
12. Wifi connection that allows me to hook up (through YM) with old friends who have been out of touch for years
13. The opportunity to stay in my job amidst the horrors of restructuring
14. TV fare that allows me relax on weekends or after a day's hard work
15. Jef and his squeals of delight when he sees me, and his great big hug to boot
16. "Tulisans" who remained to be good friends outside the walls of HOC

There's got to be more than what I listed here, because '07 was one good year for me...but the challenge has always been seeing that one moment, one person or thing as a true blessing.

Maybe I'll challenge myself this year, at the end of each day, I will write down one blessing that came my way. And by then end of '08, I would have a longer list.

I can't wait!

rntmrls

Thirty-nine. That’s the number of years he has been a father. With each offspring came greater responsibility; but Daddy cherished the role and played it superbly from the very start.

Thirty-three. That’s the number of years I’ve know him. If not for his fervent prayers I probably would not have made it past the age of one.

Four. That’s the number of children he brought to this world. All professionals now and attempting to make their own mark in the world; yet each knows that only Daddy can provide the best answers to all of life’s questions, and that he shall willingly show the way.

Almost five. That’s the number of grandchildren he has. He is a doting grandfather who balances strictness and slack; the coolest grandpa who gives the warmest hugs.

Twenty. That’s the number of years he has spent away from his family. Necessity might have taken him away from his brood, but he remains to be the head of the household.

One. That’s the number of times he gave me a spanking. Because he knows that a heart to heart conversation is better when disciplining a child. At a very young age, I realized and appreciated how my dad respected my thoughts and opinions and he eagerly listens to what I have to say.

Countless. That’s the number of time he has forgiven and understood my mistakes. Constantly assuring me that his love can go beyond my foolishness and faults; making sure that I am comforted with the thought that daddy loves me no matter what.

A million. That’s the number of times I want to say “ thank you Daddy” for being my provider, best friend, confidante, mentor and inspiration.

Love you Dad.

Angelic Encounters

I never liked kids. I find them too much to handle. They are loud, messy and constantly needing of attention. They need to be entertained, fed, bathed, taught, disciplined, put to bed, etc. Things I’d rather do for myself alone. I vowed not to have any kids in the future. I don’t want to be a mommy; it’s just too much responsibility for the likes of me.

But everything changed 12 years ago. A little boy came to the family and amused everyone with his big round eyes and curly hair. He was so tiny, a few ounces short of 5 pounds. He looked so fragile, so weak, but he made everyone feel light inside. Just a few days after his arrival, I knew I was in love.

I never thought it would be possible to fall in love twice, and at the same time. But exactly a year after the first angel came, a second cherub made its way to my heart. He was as small as the first and quite as fragile too. But the same thing happened, again I fell in love.

My life was never the same again with the 2 boys around. All of a sudden I was anticipating their every smirk, smile, coo and pout. A few months after, I graduated to first words, first steps, new expressions and new antics. Fast forward to pre-school years, I had to be up-to-date with news of their achievements in school; I had to be present in every major school event, and would sit proudly amongst the crowd, beaming at my two angels.

A few years ago, Gabriel and Rafael had to go to the states to be with their Dad (my kuya) for good. It was a heartbreaking time of my life, knowing that I will no longer be a first row spectator to their young lives. No more unexpected phone calls from radar because Gabriel didn’t want to finish his homework. No more encounters with a tearful Raffy because he didn’t want to take his medicine. No more squeals of delight when I bring treats home or fights to referee because someone didn’t have his turn with the PS2. No more butts to wash, faces to clean, hairs to comb. No more big hugs, wet kisses.

My two angels are big boys now. A few years shy of adolescence. I’ve missed a major part of their childhood, and I know that is something that can never be brought back. But I am thankful that they have grown into fine young men; smart, talented and respectful.

Gabriel and Raffy, Happy Birthday to you both. You are always in Tita Daph’s prayers. I miss you so much and I always pray that we’ll see each other again.

Tagaytay Getaway

Friday to Sunday was jampacked with activities for me. I spent the past 2 weeks planning an out of town trip for my family, in time for my mom’s birthday. Since I was in Tagaytay in February, I thought why not have the whole family stay in SMC’s facility there? That way, they will get to see where I stay every time I do team building programs in Tagaytay. Also, the last time we were there as a family was when we brought my two little nephews to the Residence Inn Zoo. The two boys are in the US now and a whole lot bigger than they were back then.

A couple of days before Friday, I was asked by a colleague for assistance to co-facilitate a teambuilding program for Magnolia Inc. I was having second thoughts at first knowing that I will be in Tagaytay a day ahead of my family and wouldn’t have time with them until I finish my program on Saturday. But then again, I love facilitating team buildings so I said yes.


Early Friday morning I was on the road to Tagaytay already. There were a couple of outdoor activities that morning but stupid me, I didn’t bring my sun block. Not even a hat to cover my face! The following day, there were again a couple of outdoor activities and of course, without sun block, I ended up toasted and roasted under the sun!! (Now the problem is I’m emceeing a wedding reception this Saturday and my skin is all ruined! Good thing Annie is loaning me some make-up that will blend with my skin better.)

As I was doing the first activity on Saturday, I saw the van my family is riding entering the gate with Joven waving wildly from the front seat. That was around 10AM. I thought I would finish my program by 12noon but a number of delays happened so I ended up closing the program at 2:30! Aaaaargh! So they had to make do with amusing themselves as they waited for me.


After my program, I just took a shower and we all went out for the zoo trip. We really want Jeff to enjoy the zoo the way Gabriel and Rafi did. But this little boy is a scaredy-cat; he was running away from the caged animals! Especially when he saw the fake giant gorilla (the size of KingKong) by the entry way, he took the opposite route just so that he won’t be near the giant gorilla.


There was also a giant snake out of its cage which you could take a picture with for P20. Nanay and Mae took the bait and had their picture taken with the giant snake on their shoulders. Cool! It took us around 10 minutes trying to convince Joven to do the same, No luck there. I guess Jeff took after him hehehe.

We went down several flights of stairs to look at the different exotic birds and I had great difficulty going up and down the steps. Since it was cold, my knees were killing me again, especially since I’ve been on my feet, running and walking and standing for the past 2 days.



After the zoo trip, we went someplace where Jeff can go horseback riding. He’s been pestering the whole family about it since morning. We went to Viewsite restaurant where they are charging P250 for 10 rotations around the perimeter of the area. The area was so small that the ride would probably end in less than 20 minutes. So we looked for another place and found one which was charging P250 per hour. Jeff and Mae took turns riding the horse and I guess they enjoyed the experience. Jeff even wanted to ride again after dinner.

Dinner was at a road side bulaluhan. We were supposed to have a barbecue dinner inside MTC (Management Training Center) while having karaoke numbers but all 8 of my family members forgot about the marinated pork chops and chicken. But dinner was still yummy! We ordered bulalo (this shouldn’t be missed when in Tagaytay) sizzling sisig, sizzling shanghai and grilled squid. Thanks to mommie’s senior citizen card, we got a 20% discount (ay si Brad pala ang nagbayad)!

After dinner we went back to MTC, took showers then geared up for the karaoke session. But then again Ate and Fel were too tired running after Jeff, Mommie and Nanay just preferred watching TV and Mae has some studying to do. So that left Joven, Dionne and I having the karaoke machine all to ourselves. What’s funny is, we got to use all karaoke machines set up in MTC. We first sang at the 3rd floor lounge of the Training building, then the multi purpose lounge at the lodging house, then the dining room. Beat that!

My two companions got sleepy already at around 12pm so we decided to head back to our rooms. We almost fell down laughing, talking about our driver whom we were imagining to be a vampire. He was sleeping in Dionne and Joven’s room so we were kidding Brad that he will wake up in the middle of the night to bite him in the neck.

I woke up at around 6AM and since my elder sister was already up, I asked her to come with me in touring the grounds of the MTC. We went to the helipad and from there we saw Joven and Dionne already playing basketball at the outdoor court. Soon after we woke everyone up because breakfast was ready. We feasted on garlic rice, danggit, omelette, tocino and bananas with freshly brewed coffee to boot.




After breakfast we showered and got ready for check out. We were going to Calruega for the 11AM mass. We reached Caleruega shortly before 11AM and were able to take some more pictures before heading to the church on top of the hill.



After the mass we got on the road again this time headed for home. We stopped by a roadside plant store because mommie has been wanting to buy plants since the day before. She's really keen on her gardening and very good at it too! We also had a late lunch at Max's and a stopover at Rowena's for pasalubong before finally heading for Manila.



I had to be dropped off in Makati so I can go straight home to Pasig since I still had laundry to do. Good thing when I got home Lyndon was half through with the laundry so I actually had time to just watch TV and relax. My body was aching all over with all the walking and running (after Jeff) and climbing I had to do. I was sooo stressed out, both physically and mentally.

But it was all worth it. Weekend getaways like these seldom happen in our family, but I want to organize another family get-together like this before summer ends. Hopefully I can pull it off.

ruminations

Just this morning, Ate and I were talking about how old we now are, because she saw an old t-shirt which was about 6 years old. She distinctly remembers when the t-shirt was bought because it was what Fel wore to the surprise 30th birthday party we gave her. She's turning 37 in August, while I turned 32 early this year.

Me at 3 years old, My big sister at 8

Funny, I sometimes forget that 32 is big number, considering that at this age, my mom already had her third child (me) and was more or less completely settled with her life. She had started working again and much must have felt a lot certain for her.

Comparing it with where I am right now, I don't even feel that I am even half-way there (where I should be) or that I have at least taken the first step to certainty. I know I have a good job, I am with a person I truly love, I have friends and family whose loyalty are unquestionable...and yet there is this nagging feeling that I'm just going where my feet are taking me, and that I am not truly in control.

But making the best of what there is, has been a honed talent for me. I've come to learn that there is just much that life can give you. Even when you feel that you deserve more, sometimes the circumstances will completely invalidate that feeling. And so I learned to just deal with what life brings, and be thankful of the bonuses that come from time to time.

What comes with this pseudo-contentment state is the fear that I end up not getting what I really want in life. I used to be a go-getter, and dipped my fingers in what I felt would catapult me to greater heights. I used to work and study at the same time, wanting to earn my master's degree at 23. I owned a training firm at 24, ran a business at 25 and was an utter failure at 26. Life was very fast, and I was drowned in the waves of my stupidity. I used to think that by living fast, you get to claim success even faster. I should have taken it slow, made sure that I am able to digest the lessons of each experience, made each second count.

But God is good, He gave me another chance. Another opportunity to feel worthy of my parents' pride. But I'm taking it slow this time. Small, careful steps. Yeah, that's it. Small careful steps...